If You Have Aides, 3 Things You Have to Remember About Acting Like Your Own Boss, aka YOU’RE in Charge!

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It’s so hard to deal with people. I had aides in New Jersey and had to find even more aides for my stroke care when I came to Pittsburgh. I called them personal assistants to give the job a more elevated status. It didn’t help.

One was allegedly addicted to cocaine. One brought her boyfriend every time.  One told me I was discriminating against her when she couldn’t lift my wheelchair anymore. One took her 2 whining children along.

One smoked wherever she went, even when there were “no smoking” signs posted. It was like a revolving door. I hired and then I fired. But what they all had in common was they needed moneymy money. It took me a year to finally figure it out.

There are tons of aides, I later found out, through various websites. But the trick is finding great ones. You have work ahead of you as well. These 3 tips will help you find and keep the aides you want!

1. Establish your role from the start

Unless it’s your wife or husband, they’re your employees, not the other way around. They work for you. And as your employees, give them a fair chance of doing things their own way. Then, if you don’t like the way things are done, speak up. That was the hardest part for me, realizing that they work for me. But once I did, that was the end of feeling like they were in charge. Plus, they’re not mind readers. You have to tell them what you like and what you don’t!

2. Appreciate your employees
When you’re your own boss, you’re dealing with people who, as a matter of fact, are sensitive souls. Say thank you a lot, but don’t overdo it. I used to say “thank you” roughly 100 times a day. (I started counting because I knew I was doing it too much). Now, I say thank you for above-and-beyond activities, like opening a box of tissues when not asked to do so, anticipating my bad allergies, or complimenting them on a good suggestion.

3. Give employees the resources to do their jobs

Provide them a list when they come, on things you want to get done for the day. Always stock up on kitchen and bathroom wipes, the antiseptic kind, like Clorox or Lysol. Have something to dust your furniture, and even dry washcloths will do. Keep your vacuum in top-notch condition by showing the aides how it works, i.e. filter placement and emptying it to avoid clogging. 

When all is said and done, it’s really up to you. 

Joyce Hoffman

Joyce Hoffman

Joyce Hoffman is one of the world's top 10 stroke bloggers according to the Medical News Today. You can find the original post and other blogs Joyce wrote in Tales of a Stroke Survivor. (https://talesofastrokesurvivor.blog)
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Joyce Hoffman
8 years ago

Thanks for your comment. I tried your idea, but no one answered.

Rebecca Dutton
8 years ago

These ideas are so valuable that I would love to see them in the Stroke Smart magazine published by the American Stroke Association.

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